Hayden committed suicide one year ago, today.
I started crying this morning when I woke up…not just for Hayden but for all the people I’ve lost. Sometimes, I wonder if that pain ever goes away.
I wish I could have helped him.
I wish I could have helped all of them.
I feel like it’s never going to end, that I’m going to miss them and cry over them, forever… I don’t want to stop missing them…I just want it to stop hurting so much…
At least, I’ll be keeping busy today…
THIS GIRL :D
is the books, heavy and fragrant and frayed,
the pages greasy, almost transparent, thinned
at the edges by hundreds of licked thumbs.
What you’ll remember is the dumb joy
of stumbling across a passage so perfect
it drums in your head, drowns out
the teacher and the lunch bell’s ring. You’ve stolen
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn from the library.
Lingering on the steps, you dig into your bag
to touch its heat: stolen goods, willfully taken,
in full knowledge of right and wrong.
You call yourself a thief. There are worse things,
you think, fingering the cover, tracing
the embossed letters like someone blind.
This is all you need as you take your first step
toward the street, joining characters whose lives
might unfold at your touch. You follow them into
the blur of the world. Into whoever you’re going to be.” —Dorianne Laux, excerpt from Books (via grammatolatry)
I’ve been asked this before. I think I need an FAQ.
I am not disturbed at all by dead animals. I’m actually fascinated by the science of anatomy, and death.
I use, and buy, only cruelty-free, and natural death, taxidermy. Most of what I buy are from shops in mid-west states. The seller can literally just go into a forest and find a dead animal, or remains, and clean them up. I believe that using parts of an animal that it can no longer use is beautiful, and respectful.
Then, there is the injustice and horror that goes on in the food industry, with animals. They are tortured, and caged. They live horrible lives. Some animals are even genetically modified to produce disgustingly high percentages of meat. Those animals go through a life of pain because their skeletal system cannot support what has been put on their bodies. A calf will be chained down, so that they can’t walk around or play, so their meat will be tender. I refuse to support that. Even besides that, our society eats meat in disgusting excess >.<
They are completely different things. Vegetarian only means that you don’t eat meat. It doesn’t make me not a vegetarian, because I like taxidermy.